It comes and goes, unable to make up its mind to either leave or to just stay up. I suspect its due to the many sleepless nights, where my body only begins to shut down slowly long after the sun has risen. For the past few days I have sat in the same position facing the lappie overnight, and waited for the colours of the night to diversify to the shades of red that streaks across the sky. When the traffic noise downstairs becomes too much to bear, I'll go back to my room.

Even after retiring to bed, its never for very long. 

Today it has slightly worsened, with a sore throat and feverish moments, I've been feeling really lethargic. Threw myself back to bed for a couple of hours, and felt energized enough to head for prayer meeting in church. 

I'm restless. Not that there is much to do, but perhaps that is exactly the problem. I'm being stressed up by the 'emptiness' that's welling inside. It's rather peculiar to try and explain it, but its driving me up the wall and to the brink of snapping. Maybe the onset of the holiday is finally getting to me. 4 months worth of holiday, this week is the first that I actually had the luxury to spend it at home doing whatever, days in a row. Its time for my well deserved break. The consequence? I feel extremely, squirmishly uneasy.

Like uselessly uneasy, being non-productive-like. 

Maybe I'm not used to having such luxuries anymore. I get disorientated and lose my sense of directions. As well, these days I've been doing alot of self questioning, an after effect of having way too much free time in my hands, no doubt. The self confinement over the past few days has obviously turned me insanely emo. 

But now my lil' brother is back :D I thank God that he's managed to arrive home safely and all that. There was a string of crap events and mismanagements that had prevented him from coming home on the pre-designated date, and has caused the entire family quite an awful lot of distress. Am tremendously glad, not to mention relieved that the matters sorted out rather quickly after the initial screw-up, so the two boys (my brother and Aaron) flew back from Costa Rica with no further hiccups. So yep, the whole family is together for Chinese New Year. :D

It's great to have him back after a year's worth of absence. I actually quite missed his presence. I'm sure things will take for a better turn from here on out, now that I sort of have a companion to spend the holidays with. He's gonna be an AFS volunteer soon too, so we'll be spending plenty of time this year. Finally, the KL Chapter will have another male! We definitely need more guys, yessum. 

Sze Jian even bought Bubbles a cute lil' doggie shirt. Can't wait to bring her for her walk soon and show her off again!

As well, from tomorrow onwards my days will start to stack up with momentum again, then I won't even have time to fall sick anymore :) Hopefully. Oh headache, please go away already.